trying to think positively, but it sucks
after talking with my diana last night, i was feeling pretty good about this interview on friday and the possibility of this job. at work today, i was thinking about it, and at one point, when i left my desk i was feeling really excited. i decided it sounded perfect. working in the schools and having 4 weeks off in the summer, i could maybe even think about mission trips or something. i was pumped.
then i got back to my desk and checked my email. the interview's been cancelled. the job is "on hold due to unforeseen events," which means, of course, that it's no longer available, and if it becomes available again, they'll have forgotten about me and i won't hear about it to re-apply.
serves me right. i should know better than to ever be excited about anything. yeah, yeah, sweden, dayenu. i know i've been far more blessed than i can even imagine, and getting to go to Bible school in sweden was a huge dream of mine and it came true and it was wonderful. i'm so thankful for that. i know i shouldn't be greedy. but i'm tired of dreaming and not attaining, i'm tired of getting my hopes up only to have them dashed. gotta get back to shut-down mode. life's a helluva lot easier there. damn it, why did i ever leave the kitchen?
then i got back to my desk and checked my email. the interview's been cancelled. the job is "on hold due to unforeseen events," which means, of course, that it's no longer available, and if it becomes available again, they'll have forgotten about me and i won't hear about it to re-apply.
serves me right. i should know better than to ever be excited about anything. yeah, yeah, sweden, dayenu. i know i've been far more blessed than i can even imagine, and getting to go to Bible school in sweden was a huge dream of mine and it came true and it was wonderful. i'm so thankful for that. i know i shouldn't be greedy. but i'm tired of dreaming and not attaining, i'm tired of getting my hopes up only to have them dashed. gotta get back to shut-down mode. life's a helluva lot easier there. damn it, why did i ever leave the kitchen?
posted by melilotnfosco | 9:44 PM
5 Comments:
i understand your disappointment. i shed more than a few tears over certain jobs that got away.
so let it out, it's okay to be frustrated. but then pick yourself up and keep trying. there are other jobs out there and the fact that they wanted to interview you shows that you have something that caught their attention. don't give up.
Arg!! That's frustrating! Perhaps email them back and say that you were very interested in this job and to please contact you when they re-post it.
And amen to what HS said. There are other jobs out there.
i did email them and say that.
and there aren't jobs out there. so i have to be thankful i have one.
Yes, I suppose I shouldn't have agreed with that since I have no clue what the job market is where you are. Sorry.
That being said, we've got butt-loads of jobs around here. ;)
Hobbitsister is right, they were interested enough to want to interview you! It's a bit cheesy, but I like to think of life's disappointments as God's way of building up suspense for something greater ahead :)
In the meantime, back to the prayerboard and job search. >:D<
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