i had a dream last night that i had a seizure
sometimes i just get tired of having epilepsy. i know i'm extremely blessed in that my case is so mild, and that i've been seizure free for 2 1/2 years, but sometimes it just gets old. i don't like having to take pills, i don't like having to watch how much i drink (i never let myself have more than one drink before i was diagnosed, and that's as much as i can have now, but it's the fact that it's a rule that makes me mad), i don't like having to wear a medical bracelet, i don't like that i have to be worried about seizures happening when i'm on the freeway. and i don't like the fact that my mom laughed at me when i told her i was her child with special needs. what a mean mom.
posted by melilotnfosco | 1:15 PM
7 Comments:
Mean mom.
I'm sorry you have to worry about this...
sometimes there are just those days when you stop and think "so this is what my life is now. it's not what i would have chosen for myself, and i don't want it." and it's sooo frustrating, because you can't undo it.
and then, i think, you're entitled to have a day now and then when you're crabby about it, or just want to feel like life is unfair. and people who try to talk you out of your crabbiness don't understand.
and, as long as those days don't come along too often, i think you're dealing with it just fine. i can't say i know how you feel, because i don't. and, like photo, i am sorry that you have to deal with all of this.
(and i was going to be inspirational at you, but i figured you didn't need that, so i won't)
I'm sorry. I'll pray.
i spose if i didn't have epilepsy, i wouldn't get in on good jokes, like (and i know you've heard it before, but i love it) 'how do you make a strawberry shake?' 'i don't know, how?' 'give it to auntie!' :)
I think it's a blessing in disguise. Can you imagine if you DIDN'T have epilepsy to keep your drinking to a minimum??!?
If it makes you feel better, I was a child with special needs too -- I had (have?) a BI temperament. ;)
:P
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